Sometimes You Have to Pay the Price

As previously noted on this blog, I hurt my arm a while ago. . . pesky tennis elbow.  But this time it was determined not to heal.  I missed tennis a lot, but I also missed being able to sleep at night (it would wake me) and doing every day things.
So I went back to my regular doctor who sent me to a different orthopedist for a second opinion.
First things he did were to prescribe an arm brace to keep me from straightening my arm at night and a round of physical therapy.
The arm brace made a big difference!  Hurray!  PT was painful, as it is supposed to be.  When I went back for my follow up appointment with my doctor, he jumped straight to recommending surgery.  In less than two week’s time! Wow!!!!
He knew everything I tried.  Our insurance year was about to end and the new insurance is pretty horrid so . .. . I scheduled it.
I just wasn’t sure if it was the right thing to do.  The timing wasn’t ideal as Paul would be out of town.  So I didn’t tell anyone because I hadn’t decided.
But I started making preparations to live life one handed for a while.
I knew I wouldn’t be able to tie my shoes. . .

so I bought springy shoe laces so I could slip them on.
Because tennis would be out of the question for a while and I wanted to do SOMETHING, I went shopping. . .

I cleaned my house. . .

The day before I was in full blown panic attack.  My man was not available to calm me down so I turned it over to the Lord.
David was home from school, so he was able to take me in for my surgery.
before

after

Truthfully, I don’t remember much of that day other than being drugged up.
I spent most of my time here

and a friend (who found out) brought me these

David was there for me.  He fetched me things and took care of me . .  at least that first day.  I suppose he thought it was enough.
After this was the really hard part.  It is hard not being able to care for yourself.  Life one-handed is difficult and even more so when it hurts.
I had never realized how many things it takes two hands to do.  I could not open a water bottle on my own.  I could not bath or brush my teeth.  It was so humbling to be dependent on others and even worse when they didn’t feel like helping you.
I couldn’t really cook so how was I supposed to do the dishes left piling up?

I could not go grocery shopping by myself because I couldn’t push a cart. 
My hand starting swelling up A LOT.  I was not handling it very well at all.  I hated my bandaging and not being able to do anything.

(it’s also hard to take one handed pictures much less type on the computer!)
But I was determined to find independence however I could.  I asked for help.. . and I was so blessed.  I needed some milk but knew I couldn’t do it on my own.  So one of my angels brought me milk and a treat (and put it away for me).
My hair was so disgusting and I was tired of wearing a ball cap so I asked another friend (my hairdresser) if she would wash it for me.  And she did countless times, including giving me an easy to care for style.  And she didn’t charge me a thing.

I still tear up when I think about the difference these two ladies made to me.  I went for about as low as I could sink to feeling so loved.
And that was just the first week. . .